the art on this spread is just gorgeous. The lighting and textures are just unbelievable. On another note, a clarification deal; on the top right panel it may be better to word that "lost a bunch of equipment I had just bought" as opposed to "I just bought". This may be right or wrong so someone who knows better probably will either tell you I'm stupid or agree with me. In any case just thought I'd mention it.
Great suggestion. I might just leave that one in my editors hands at this point. I just sent off everything so I am expecting to get a bunch of notes that I need to change soon.
Pointing out typo niggles on something as spectacular as this — and I can't do a lick of art — feels unworthy. If you ask, though, 'towns people' in first panel looks odd to me. 'Townspeople' without the space is a recognized compound word, and putting an apostrophe, 'town's people' would work too. I have a feeling you intended the former.
I don't think I completely understood that phrase in the 5th panel – "broken into" can only be followed by "pieces", "parts" "sections", that sort of thing, not a time reference. Care to enlighten a poor reader? :)
If a house/business/building gets “broken into”, that means it got robbed/burgled. Perhaps it’s an Americanism? I think it refers to the fact that the burgler often breaks something to get into the building.
Thanks for clarifying that Onexused. I never thought it would be unclear because I’ve always used and hear the term. I guess it is an Americanism, as you call it. :)
The art is absolutely fantastic, I love taking time after reading and taking all your work in. As for little suggestions, the frame when she says “Weird?, no nothing weird why do you ask”, I think replacing the guy in sunglasses with Victuals
Sorry guys, I had the comments turned off on this page for some reason.
the art on this spread is just gorgeous. The lighting and textures are just unbelievable. On another note, a clarification deal; on the top right panel it may be better to word that "lost a bunch of equipment I had just bought" as opposed to "I just bought". This may be right or wrong so someone who knows better probably will either tell you I'm stupid or agree with me. In any case just thought I'd mention it.
Great suggestion. I might just leave that one in my editors hands at this point. I just sent off everything so I am expecting to get a bunch of notes that I need to change soon.
As mentioned on Spread 11, "townspeople" is one word and there should be a direct address comma in "Here, Victuals".
There should also be a comma to separate the interjection "please" in "Five eighths, please."
There's should be a hyphen in "able-bodied".
Pointing out typo niggles on something as spectacular as this — and I can't do a lick of art — feels unworthy. If you ask, though, 'towns people' in first panel looks odd to me. 'Townspeople' without the space is a recognized compound word, and putting an apostrophe, 'town's people' would work too. I have a feeling you intended the former.
I don't think I completely understood that phrase in the 5th panel – "broken into" can only be followed by "pieces", "parts" "sections", that sort of thing, not a time reference. Care to enlighten a poor reader? :)
If a house/business/building gets “broken into”, that means it got robbed/burgled. Perhaps it’s an Americanism? I think it refers to the fact that the burgler often breaks something to get into the building.
Thanks for clarifying that Onexused. I never thought it would be unclear because I’ve always used and hear the term. I guess it is an Americanism, as you call it. :)
No, not an americanism – at least, we use it here in Scotland.
Fantastic, this one is great also. The others painted that picture well enough though. ;)
Lovely comic! I really like it!
You seem to swap a bit between past tense and present….you might want to look into that for nitpickings =)
The art is absolutely fantastic, I love taking time after reading and taking all your work in. As for little suggestions, the frame when she says “Weird?, no nothing weird why do you ask”, I think replacing the guy in sunglasses with Victuals